How would you feel if your girlfriend went on a vacation with her ex-boyfriend or lover? (self.AskMen)
283 ups - 0 downs = 283 votes
Mine is. And it's causing a little bit of conflict between us, just quietly. I appreciate some opinions from other people, to see if I'm being reasonable or not. Backstory - she's going away with a group of a dozen of our friends, to a ten-day long New Year's party/music festival. (I can't go, for the usual reasons - $$$, time off work, etc etc). Then her and this guy mentioned in the post title are going on after that for some adventure travelling/backpacking to some really awesome countries/places.
Her and him were fuck buddies of some kind, maybe a year or two back. (My g/f and I got together last New Year's. It's a fairly serious and committed relationship). Since my g/f and I met, I've since met the dude in question- he's a good guy. I've got no problem there.
It just seems very unusual to me (to the point of being inappropriate), to be doing that together.
Coupled with that, is my g/f's surprise that I am not "happy for her" to be going on such an awesome trip.
I haven't thrown any tantrum , or delivered any "IT'S HIM OR ME!!" ultimatum - however I did say that I'd rather not to hear about it (she talks excitedly about the plans they are making). I feel excluded from the whole experience, and I guess some level of jealousy, tbh.
Just to clarify, I do trust my girlfriend. "Generally". I do not think she has any intention of getting up to any shenanigans with the guy - at this point in time.
It just all seems very unusual to me. Weird even. I'm an older dude and have had multiple long term relationships, been married, blah blah, but I have NEVER experienced this in a relationship before.
It's starting to cause some real friction at times.
I want to sort that out and avoid the friction.
How would you feel? What would you do or say?
349 comments submitted at 00:47:15 on Aug 18, 2014 by mypantsareonmyhead