/r/sex's attempt to pinpoint how much clitoral stimulation time is enough rubs one user the wrong way... (np.reddit.com)

SubredditDrama

44 ups - 0 downs = 44 votes

45 comments submitted at 18:02:48 on Jul 27, 2014 by Zeeker12

  • [-]
  • CATHOLIC_EXTREMIST
  • -19 Points
  • 18:25:25, 27 July

The OP's story is a good explanation of why the "you have to have sex before marriage so you can build 'experience'" argument doesn't work. In the end for each individual it is going to come down to communication anyway. The OP wouldn't have this problem if her sexual partner loved her and was dedicated to learning and growing with her over the long term.

  • [-]
  • Alexandra_xo
  • 13 Points
  • 18:46:05, 27 July

Maybe she just wants casual sex.

  • [-]
  • zxcv1992
  • 7 Points
  • 18:48:22, 27 July

A woman wanting causal sex ? How dare she! /s

  • [-]
  • CATHOLIC_EXTREMIST
  • -2 Points
  • 18:57:40, 27 July

? how is that related to what I said?

  • [-]
  • zxcv1992
  • 1 Points
  • 18:58:39, 27 July

It's not, it's just a joke.

  • [-]
  • StopTalkingOK
  • 1 Points
  • 19:14:45, 27 July

Hahaha

  • [-]
  • CATHOLIC_EXTREMIST
  • 0 Points
  • 18:59:20, 27 July

o ok, thanks for clarifying

  • [-]
  • CATHOLIC_EXTREMIST
  • -7 Points
  • 18:49:50, 27 July

Then her partners will only have a casual interest in her sexual needs. I don't know what she expects, she's frustrated that her sexual partners are not taking her seriously... but casual sex is not a serious relationship.

  • [-]
  • Alexandra_xo
  • 7 Points
  • 18:51:41, 27 July

Believe it or not, it is possible to have passionate casual sex.

Edit: I had a guy make me cum 4 times... Then he never called me again :(

I wanted more.

  • [-]
  • CATHOLIC_EXTREMIST
  • -3 Points
  • 18:55:11, 27 July

She's not having trouble finding guys with some energy, she's frustrated that none of these casual partners is a man that cares about her.

  • [-]
  • KeepSmilingAmerica
  • 4 Points
  • 19:01:19, 27 July

No her problem is finding men who know how to fuck.

  • [-]
  • CATHOLIC_EXTREMIST
  • 1 Points
  • 19:18:16, 27 July

OP even states they have plenty of "experience" before her, that isn't their problem. Their problem is they don't care enough to listen to her.

  • [-]
  • Alexandra_xo
  • 3 Points
  • 18:59:53, 27 July

It's not about caring about her, it's about focusing on what she needs to get off. If it's a casual thing, she probably doesn't want them to care about her. She just wants them to listen. She tells them what to do and they decide they know better than her about her own body. It was just a rant. I've gone through a spell like that before too. Eventually you find someone who isn't so selfish.

  • [-]
  • CATHOLIC_EXTREMIST
  • 0 Points
  • 19:09:35, 27 July

>It's not about caring about her, it's about focusing on what she needs to get off.

Why would the care about focusing on her sexual needs if they don't care about her?

>she probably doesn't want them to care about her. She just wants them to listen. She tells them what to do and they decide they know better than her about her own body.

She wants them to listen to her, but she doesn't want them to care about her... so she wants them to act like someone who cares about her while actually being someone who doesn't care about her... and then she is confused when they act like someone who doesn't care about her.

>It was just a rant.

I don't go in for the "she's just a hysterical woman" line.

  • [-]
  • FuturePigeon
  • 1 Points
  • 19:18:42, 27 July

It's a mutual respect for the other's experience. They should care about making her cum because she should care about making them cum.

Most men need more than a cold fish to enjoy themselves, most women need more than a jackhammer for them to enjoy themselves. Why else would they have sex if not to enjoy themselves? Working to pleasure the other is the ticket price for sex.

  • [-]
  • KeepSmilingAmerica
  • 3 Points
  • 18:59:29, 27 July

This must be why the divorce rate is so low.

  • [-]
  • CATHOLIC_EXTREMIST
  • 0 Points
  • 19:01:27, 27 July

Lack of communication leads to a lot of problems.

  • [-]
  • KeepSmilingAmerica
  • 3 Points
  • 19:04:18, 27 July

And dudes not knowing how female sexuality works and refusing to learn leads to some as well. This is a complete non sequitur.

  • [-]
  • CATHOLIC_EXTREMIST
  • 2 Points
  • 19:17:29, 27 July

>And dudes not knowing how female sexuality works

communication

  • [-]
  • nermid
  • 2 Points
  • 19:06:40, 27 July

Ha HA! You almost got me!

  • [-]
  • CATHOLIC_EXTREMIST
  • -2 Points
  • 19:10:37, 27 July

If I ever do get you, feel free to stop by any Catholic Church sometime to meet the people, or maybe even start on /r/Catholicism.

  • [-]
  • nermid
  • 1 Points
  • 19:20:02, 27 July

Sorry. That would conflict with my subscription to /r/excatholic.

  • [-]
  • out_stealing_horses
  • 1 Points
  • 19:17:00, 27 July

That doesn't happen in marital relationships either, so essentially no argument about the investment of people in "the relationship" in the contractual vs. casual sense, is defensible.