What's your secret sexual fantasy? (NSFW) (self.AskReddit)

AskReddit

129 ups - 64 downs = 65 votes

Get your throwaways ready, what's that one dirty fantasy that you'd never tell anyone? Have you ever actually gone through with it?

My answer here

239 comments submitted at 05:05:24 on Feb 18, 2013 by BigTopMopShop

  • [-]
  • agentsirus
  • 36 Points
  • 06:37:03, 18 February

I will admit, I'm a guy and I'd love to take a woman by force. No, I don't mean hurt a woman by holding her down and brutalizing her.

However, it would be hot to storm into a woman's room late at night and then gaze at her while she shrivels a little under the covers. To hear her voice ask who is there when she realized I was coming for her body. To climb upon her trembling frame and feel her shiver when I smelled her up and down like a rabid animal. To sense her quiver when I run my finger along her stomach. To listen to her sharp breath when I fidget with the waistband of her panties.

I picture her to be a pretty little daddy's girl or uptight snob who would normally look down upon me.

Mmm. Good stuff. But of course I'd never do anything of the sort.

  • [-]
  • boomsc
  • -37 Points
  • 08:40:04, 18 February

seriously the fuck. Who actually fantasizes about raping people?!

Seriously? get counselling, before you fuck up lives.

Edit: Fucking morons, seriously. Don't talk about liking the idea of the KKK or wishing for white supremacy again for insulting people, but rape? go ahead and talk about how great that is! So long as it gets you horny....fucktards.

  • [-]
  • ShelfLifeInc
  • 31 Points
  • 08:52:58, 18 February

Hey hey hey! There's a massive difference between rape and consensual non-consent.

ie, the former makes me sick. The latter makes me wet.

I'm a girl who likes to be taken in a very animalistic way. The above description is definitely my kind of thing.

However, if someone were to break into my room tonight and take me by force, it would be rape because there is no consent or trust. On the other hand, ff I spoke to my lover/partner/someone I trusted, negotiated such a scene, and had established boundries and safe-words, the above would make for a wonderful night.

  • [-]
  • violue
  • 4 Points
  • 09:06:23, 18 February

~~>There's a massive difference between rape and consensual non-consent.~~

~~What? Did you just make that term up or something? Consensual non-consent isn't a thing, it's a paradox.~~

~~But yes, there's a difference between rape and rape fantasy.~~

Oop, I guess it is a thing. TIL!

  • [-]
  • ShelfLifeInc
  • 3 Points
  • 09:11:01, 18 February

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Consent%28BDSM%29#Consensualnon-consent

Plus google.

  • [-]
  • violue
  • 9 Points
  • 09:19:54, 18 February

I'll be damned :o

Consider me schooled!

  • [-]
  • ShelfLifeInc
  • 5 Points
  • 09:21:14, 18 February

Your respectful retraction is greatly appreciated. :)

  • [-]
  • boomsc
  • -9 Points
  • 09:07:54, 18 February

Then it's not Rape is it. you said it yourself, it's not a rape fantasy if it's pre-arranged, consensual sex, it's just somewhere on the BDSM giving yourself up scale.

You have any idea how insulting and stupid it comes across to the rest of the world to say you have a rape fantasy? "Oh..I know rape culture is a horrible thing, and all these women and men are suffering intensely, but y'know...just...just being raped like that, shoved up against a wall and fucked in a dark alley at night by a guy I don't know, with his hand over my mouth so I can't scream...just....god yes"

Pedophiles don't talk about their desires for a good reason, it sickens and offends people. If you're fucked up enough to actually want to be raped (Or 'consensual non-consent', doesn't matter, all three of you have called it rape, that's what you're treating it as.) keep it fucking private and don't insult the thousands of rape victims around the world, and give people, like that guy above, ideas there might be a green light for rape if they think there's a chance the victim might secretly be enjoying it, 50 Shades style.

  • [-]
  • ShelfLifeInc
  • 10 Points
  • 09:20:07, 18 February

Please do not talk to me like I am a rape apologist or compare me to a paedophile. Perhaps you're right, I shouldn't have used the term "rape". Ravishment is often preferred. But do not make assumptions or generalisations about my fetishes or fantasies.

The reason people are often quiet about their kinky fetishes is because of reactions like the one you have just demonstrated. I repeat, there is a world of difference between someone who says, "I like the idea of taking advantage of a woman in a fantasy setting" and "I want to rape someone". Any man who takes a woman by force on the off-chance she might be secretly enjoying it is a rapist. A man with a dominance fetish will ask permission, will negotiate safe-words, will develop a relationship of respect and trust with any sub they interact with. Anyone who demonstrates predatory behaviour within the fetish community is evicted and does not come back.

Fantasies are just that - fantasies. Constructed scenes. You might fantasise about breaking into a chocolate factory and eating everything in sight, but that doesn't mean you're going to do it. I am a kinky girl who grew up with fantasies of being someone's pet, or slave, of being under someone else's control, and I am also a woman who is a vicious advocate of women's rights, rape prevention, and harsher punishments against rapists. I can be both.

  • [-]
  • boomsc
  • -4 Points
  • 10:12:18, 18 February

Yes, you can. So learn that it's inappropriate to use the word "rape" in the context of something to ever be enjoyed.

BDSM is fine, domming and subbing is great, and a personal pleasure, any kink is fine and something you should be able to enjoy, as long as it doesn't hurt others (Don't read into this, I mean -unwanted- hurt, not including pain fetishes). You're right, there is a massive world of difference between wanting to be utterly dominated and taken, and being raped. So make that distinction.

>"I Have a serious rape fantasy"

Is not an appropriate thing to say. For the exact reasons I gave, it devalues and detracts from the very real harm and pain that rape victims suffer, and creates a voice that says "Rape is okay...some people like it." that's exactly what you're doing. when you say "I have a rape fetish" that's all you're doing. turning a crime into an acceptable kink.

You clearly understand the difference between rape and dom/sub play, so actually say as much when you talk about it. You don't have a rape fetish, you have a fetish for being the sub, and for controlling play. Rape is entirely non-consensual, you don't get consensual non-consent in rape, that's the whole point of it being made a crime, it's a bad thing. Call it political correctness if you like, and it probably is, but the fact remains, you don't go out and announce your views on black subjugation to the world. You don't call your fantasy of being a school-girl fucked by the headmaster a paedophile fetish, so why the fuck would you call it a rape fetish? Call it what it is, sub and dom play, or BDSM, or whatever actual fetish you like, instead of a crime.

And my point is made perfectly with AgentSirus. Read through his actual comment again, read it instead of seeing only your self validation

>while she shrivels a little

>who is there when she realized I was coming for her body

>trembling frame and feel her shiver when I smelled her up and down like a rabid animal

At what point does he mention her knowing who he is, or having ever arranged it beforehand? any iota of consent? He even acknowledges at the end,

>of course I'd never do anything of the sort

that's rape. He is being upvoted and defended by you, a supposed advocate of rape prevention, for detailing exactly how he'd love to rape a complete stranger

>uptight snob who would normally look down upon me

You realise that's the 'reason' behind a lot of rapists victim choices? people who look better off, snobby, higher up, someone they can knock off a high perch with their penis.

  • [-]
  • bunnylovesalion
  • 3 Points
  • 09:59:33, 18 February

... I'm really not understanding the point of you picking a fight over this. It's the internet. If you don't like it then go to another thread or GTFO and stop badgering people just because it isn't something that you are intrested in. That's just ridiculous.

  • [-]
  • boomsc
  • -5 Points
  • 10:17:26, 18 February

Because I like to think I can make a difference.

Ironically, I am interested in dom/sub play, and do so frequently. I am not interested in rape, because oddly enough I'm not a criminal with anger and power complexes, or any of the other reasons rapists rape. However, my SO was also raped and abused when they were younger, so I'm all too aware the impact using the wrong words can have; and I won't allow people to treat something that nearly ruined my lover's life as a casual sex interest.

You like rape? then GTFO of a country that abhors it.

  • [-]
  • bunnylovesalion
  • 2 Points
  • 10:30:51, 18 February

Reddit is a community of people from all over the world, not just wherever it is you're at (which I'm guessing is the U.S.A.). I'm not encouraging rape, but for you to be so harsh over the internet just because your SO's life was ruined by it is kind of ridiculous. Basically what I'm saying is: It's the internet. Get over it. People are going to say whatever they're going to say and if you don't like it then look the other way. Unless you see an actual video of someone being raped or if you find child porn (or whatever unseakable shit people post) then there's nothing you can do about it. Getting pissy at someone for saying something you don't like isn't going to change what happened to your SO or anyone else who has been raped. All you can do is be there for them and support them.

  • [-]
  • boomsc
  • -2 Points
  • 10:47:23, 18 February

(Nope, Wales) Yeah, reddit is an enormous community, but rape is illegal the world over. US, UK, Russia, South Africa, Amsterdam, Japan and China has such issues with it they've started women only trains in attempts to curb the crime. Even Iran, Iraq, Malaysia, India all prosecute rape, it is never legal. In many Muslim countries marital rape is still allowed, that's the one exception, and none of these 'rape fetishes' seem to revolve around being raped by a husband, oddly.

Yes, people will say whatever they like, but why should I look the other way? if people are going to advocate rape, I'm damn well going to stand there and argue with them for all the world to see. No, nothing I say or do will change the past, and in all likelyhood it wont change rapists from being rapists. But there's always the possibility people reading the topic will read my comments, and come to understand the problem with saying something harmful. If I don't respond, then people see nothing but comments lauding rape and bigging it up as a fantasy. As of now 32 people have upvoted the original post, that's a significant number, that might suggest to someone contemplating rape that there's a decent chance if he rapes someone, they'll enjoy it deep down.

My words are nothing but another voice on the internet, but there's always the chance they'll change someone's view, make them a better person, do something good, and if I make a single person stop and think about what's been said, then I've done my job. If I don't comment, then no one will know.

  • [-]
  • bunnylovesalion
  • 3 Points
  • 11:00:54, 18 February

I understand what you're saying about being heard, but I think there's a better way to do that than to be so incredibly harsh about it like you were being even with you feeling as strongly about it as you do. Regardless of what you say though there's going to be girls out there with that non-consent fantasy that a rapist may happen upon. Rapists don't rape to hope that they find a random girl who will enjoy it, they rape because they like hurting the person they're doing it to and they enjoy the adrenaline rush that they get from putting so much fear into another person.

  • [-]
  • boomsc
  • 1 Points
  • 11:07:13, 18 February

True, I suppose I was overly harsh, the sight of so many upvotes on such a wrong thing to say boils my blood (especially on AgentSirus response, seriously...that is nothing but a description of rape)

And it varies, -most- do it for empowerment or to hurt, others do it because they have a psychological illness or compulsion, or desperation or obsession with a particular person, and it's always a scale. My fear comes from the worry that there might be a person out there...or several, who are on the very brink, they know it's wrong to rape, but they really really want to. Allowing the kind of comments AgentSirus and Agirlwithafantasy to go unchallenged potentially removes that knowledge that rape is wrong, or leaves the suggestion that "rape can be ok, in the 'right circumstances'."