The Difference Between Dominance and Abuse (self.RedPillWomen)

{RedPillWomen}

29 ups - 8 downs = 21 votes

(I realized I should have posted this as text not a link)

[Man, 45, brutally beat his wife with a wooden spoon because she didn't call him 'sir' in front of their kids] (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2451647/Dan-Kirby-Kopp-beat-wife-spoon.html)

I'm posting this to illustrate the difference between a healthy "power exchange" relationship and an unhealthy one. The man in this example was extreme. He was abusive vs. corrective. This is a lose-lose situation. If you can't control yourself to this point your wife will not feel secure or safe and you will lose her loyalty. And rightfully so! A man that loses control to this degree didn't have control to begin with.

Ladies, this is a very important distinction. You want a dominant man not an overbearing man. A dominant man is in control of himself first and foremost. An overbearing man to this degree is still infantile. He wants control so he lashes out much like a child throwing a tantrum to get their way. If he had control to begin with he wouldn't have had to resort to this, plain and simple. Don't confuse anger with control or dominance. These days we have been so misinformed about Alpha men that we think it is the same as abuse so we either loath Alpha men or we accept abuse thinking it's one and the same. No, no, no. Alphas, dominants, won't lose it like this.

Even if you are "into" domestic discipline there is a difference between losing it like this and controlled discipline.

If a man you are considering for partnership displays this sort of spastic anger he isn't an Alpha. Drop him and run for the hills. He needs to really sort himself out.

36 comments submitted at 17:57:01 on Oct 10, 2013 by margerym

  • [-]
  • [deleted]
  • 1 Points
  • 21:03:55, 10 October

[deleted]

  • [-]
  • margerym
  • 1 Points
  • 18:13:31, 11 October

> but I don't think it's acceptable to let a man beat you in front of your kids

I don't think "let" comes into it, honestly. We talk here all the time about how women are the weaker sex. He wants to beat her, he is going to beat her. That's a really scary thought, isn't it? This is why I said in my OP to run for the hills if he displays behavior like this, where he is so out of control of himself.

It's also incredibly complicated. The rationalization hamster runs with this, as well. "He'll change" "he didn't mean it" "It'll get better" "I'm overreacting" etc. As outside observers we can think "how could she let this happen?" but when you're in it it looks a lot different than seeing the whole picture in retrospect.

  • [-]
  • danabanana9
  • 3 Points
  • 01:27:00, 12 October

not to mention the super hot make up sex

here's ther real truth about "abusive relationships":

abuse + hot make up sex = love and ill forgive you and stay with you forever

abuse because dinner's not on the table + no more hot makeup sex = police!! help i need a restraining order! i just COULDNT leave him before!

downvote that, you dumb fucking coozes because you know its true